pacing lang yan?

hey how's everyone? i understand that no one really has time to update their blogs but i do hope you have time to read my rants.

i'm quite nervous about a lot of things. work, first and foremost. i don't have much to do in the morning, and i get nervous about getting too busy in the afternoon, leaving things behind when it's evening, and having things catch up on me when events have to be set. communicating doesn't seem to be a popular activity in the office, and it's either i'm the go-between, or they don't really let me know anything until the last minute. case in point: it's already tuesday, and i don't know if i'm going to bacolod this weekend, and what the plans are, what my duties are, if ever. i'm nervous that being out during the weekends will drain me and make me inefficient during weekdays when there is still so much to do for other activities and projects. even if it's quite an experience to go to seven different cities, i'm quite reluctant to put aside my personal life for one whole month. because things that have potential to flourish, and old ones that need to be maintained will be neglected. like you...the poet...my acting stint...my co-star...my holy girls.

i'm nervous about the poet, and how things fly by fast. he takes up a lot of my free time, texting, talking, taking me out. i'm nervous about exposing myself emotionally at this rate. and he's doing the same too. i have misgivings, but like he said, it's like we hit the lotto with the synchronicity of our world and personalities. is that something i can allow to pass by?

and then there's my holy girl may, this film i'm starring in, and my breathtaking co-star. ayokong mabitin yung director dahil wala ako palagi to shoot. ayokong sobrang tagal na hindi ako makikita ng co-star ko. kasi nagagandahan at nababaitan daw siya sa akin sabi ni may, pero torpe siya - and it was obvious.

so i'm trying to slow it down with the poet, speed things up with my co-star, catch up with you guys, and keep up with work. clearly i have pace issues.

i feel like i'm playing with fire and i'm quite nervous.